It is the 8th of November 2016 and I
don’t know anyone who voted for Hillary Clinton. I suspect that I won’t find anyone if I look
the rest of the day or the week or the month or the year.
What?
I don’t know anyone who voted for Obama in 2008
or 2012. Seriously, I don’t know a single person who voted for him.
When I think back on it, I don’t know anyone that voted for Bill Clinton in
1992 or 1996 either. I know some people who voted for him for governor,
but not for president.
Put aside your partisan politics for a moment
and consider this. Most people in the United States do not remember who
they voted for in the last Presidential Election. I don't remember and I
suspect that you don't either. So you think I'm nuts do you? Well
that may be true, but I'm certain of my facts.
I also have it on good authority that
fewer than 600 people voted for Bill Clinton in 1992, and even with his mandate
in 1996, there were fewer than 538 that voted for him that year. I'm not
getting these figures from some straw poll I conducted in downtown Burns Flat,
America--though that is both the cultural and political center of this great
republic (OK, that last part is only opinion, but the rest of this article is
fact). Being the only Republican from a family of Democrats, I often am
not taken seriously when I tell them that I have never met anyone that voted
for Clinton. Still don't believe me? So you want answers? You
want the truth? You can't handle the truth. In 1992, only 370
people voted for Clinton. In 1996, only 379 people voted for him, but
sure enough that's him in the oval office.
Want to know more? The real election
for president didn't occur until December in 1992 and in 1996. We have
narrowed it down to 538 people that could have voted for Clinton in 1996--and
you thought we conducted elections by secret ballot. Actually, the people
that elected our current president even signed their names to their ballot and
your government knows who they are. You say that 538 number
sounds familiar, but you can't quite place it. It's got nothing to do
with the grassy knoll or the number of times that your Microsoft operated
computer shuts down each day due to an illegal operation. That's right
it's the total number of Senators and Representatives in the United States
Congress, but they don't elect the president. In fact, they are not even
permitted to vote for the president. So is this coincidence or
conspiracy?
Actually, it's neither. It's Article
II, Section 1 of the Constitution of the United States of America that provides
for the election of a United States President. "Each State shall
appoint, in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct, a Number of Electors,
equal to the whole Number of Senators and Representatives to which the State
may be entitled in the Congress: but no Senator or Representative, or Person
holding an Office of Trust or Profit under the United States, shall be
appointed an Elector." Yes our president is elected by people we
call electors. When you vote in a presidential election, you are voting
for electors. We call this group of people the Electoral College.
This is a special year in our country's constitutional process. We
get to experience both a census and a presidential election. By mid
September, when your television is inundated with political commercials and
commentaries, you'll probably say "enough with the experience."
But with Independence Day still on our minds, this might just be a good time to
find a copy of our Constitution and refresh our memories on how we elect a
president.
I'll close with a special warning to my
Republican brethren. The fox is in the henhouse. Guess who is in
charge of counting the votes for the 2000 Presidential Election? You
guessed it--Al Gore. That Buddhist Temple stuff is small potatoes
compared to this. Speaking of potatoes, wasn't it Dan Quale that was in
charge of counting the votes for president in 1992? I knew we should have
followed up after that spelling thing…
This was a piece first
published in conjunction with the 2000 election. I occasionally resurrect
it with a new hook during subsequent elections.
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